Friends?

Lord, HELP ME!

You may have picked this up from my previous posts, but I have been divorced for six years. My ex and I have remained friends, or somewhat friends and were speaking every now and again. The conversations were more about me being his friend them him being mine. It was a hard break up because we were together for nine years and it hard to let go of him while we watched the other grow professional, individually, and spiritually.

Not long ago, my ex and I got in an argument. We were yelling at each other, over the phone, about something that happened SIX years ago. So, I am mad at him and do not want to talk to him. I am not ready to be friends again. (Yes, I know. This sounds ridiculous but he did something REALLY bad and hurtful to me.)

And then today….. I found him on Facebook. Do I want him to be my friend? Should I wait for him to find me? He has the link to this blog but I do not believe he reads it. On Facebook, he can really know every detail of my life. I think I am not ready to be friends again.

And then… I read my horoscope. It is the one posted on msnbc.com, under the entertainment section. Ya know, because it’s just entertainment. Right?

This is what it reads for today:

It's time to make up, mend fences and break bread. Whatever you want to call it, be sure you do it. This minor dispute has been going on for long enough, hasn't it? Now it's time to do the adult thing and put it to rest. The heavens are in the perfect frame of mind to help you out, and your place would definitely be the best venue for the event. Ready? Now grab that phone and start dialing.

I can’t do it. I can’t call. I am not ready to be friends again. No matter what my horriblescope says.