Sunday, November 22, 2015

10 Month and Co-Sleeping

My baby boy is ten months old today. He is crawling and lifting himself up.  The past three weeks have been brutal with teething but we made it past the initial hump of four new teeth.

When Nate was born I was good about nursing him then putting him down in his pack-n-play located in our bed room.  Somewhere around month three, da mister suggested I just leave him in bed with me because it would be much easier and I would get more sleep. And it was initially.  

Then the nights turned into day time naps and  there you have it, we were co-sleeping.  Since I am a light sleeper, this has been hard on me because Nate would wake every few hours to nurse or just move and disturb my sleep.  I have been a walking zombie and this sleep pattern was not working for me. 

I tried exactly two times to let him cry it out but I could not take him screaming. So what does an exhausted mother do?  For me, I was tired.  My arms hurt from carrying around a cranky baby and I finally broke down.  

This past week I have endured the cries during nap time and on Friday evening I placed him in his crib for night time sleep.  Surprisingly, the night time sleep has been quiet even though not much sleep is really happening at this point. 

It is hard to hear him cry but I know that we are learning to self sooth (for me to) and develop better sleeping behaviors. What gives me hope is my pediatrician said that no parent that has ever done the cry out method has ever been sorry that they did. 

There you have it folks.  Barbie's guild to getting more sleep and getting stuff done.

Monday, November 16, 2015


Recently I was challenged with selfies and taking the perfect picture.  I know I do it and I am sure you do it too.  We take a picture over and over and in different poses to find the one we like.  Then we spend another thirty minutes going through the all the pictures to find the best one to post on social media.  We only want to post the best picture of our self for the world to see.

It surprised me to read the comments on my FaceBook about this picture because in general they said, "You look so beautiful," but what I was feeling was so different.  

This day was October 31, 2015- Nathaniel's first Halloween. We also decided to have a gender reveal party to announce the sex of our new baby.  Let me lay my day down for you.  

I have a nine month old teething baby, I am not sleeping through the night and get two hours of sleep at a time, 10 AM appointment, 1 PM party, skip nap time due to late arrivals to the party, sneak in late lunch early dinner, get to the pumpkin patch one hour before closing, and I am 14 weeks pregnant. Through all that, I finally relaxed in a safe place with my baby.  I remember thinking, Wow, I finally get to sit down. I am happy to capture the joy of this moment with my baby boy. Okay, let me sit him on my lap to hide my baby bump and take a picture. 

I wish I could have a picture of me and Nate smiling but this was the best we could do. We made it and I have my cherished picture of Nathaniel in his blue M&M costume surrounded by pumpkins for his first Halloween. You may see only my smile and baby, but for me I remember every detail of the day.  Rushed, tired, and joyful are all things that I will remember when I see this picture.  

Sunday, November 1, 2015

What it takes to be a Mom

This past week was the fifth year anniversary of my mother passing away. I miss her daily and remember what an amazing women she was.  As I struggle with the daily chores of being a mother, I recall all that Mom did and I wonder how she managed it all.  She went to nursing school, worked full time, volunteered at our PTA, was our Girl Scout Leader, organized employee picnics, played softball, and sold Mary Kay cosmetics.  There are days when I struggle just to brush my teeth and get myself dressed much less do homework with da boyz and cook dinner. Every day I am reminded how strong and determined Mom was. She is my roll model and is exactly like the mother I want to be to my children. 

What is a mother?  In the narrow sense of the word it comes down to caring for your children's success and guiding them and showing them how to become independent individuals. But it is much more than that.  It is never giving up, having patients, and caring enough to parent your child- even on the days when your patients runs out. 

Joe caught me off guard and said, "Mommie take our picture".  I'm not sure at what point he felt comfortable enough to call me Mommie but it is a moment that I have hoped for but never expected. It has not happened since but it is always a moment to capture. 

I love seeing the big boys play with Nate.  They carry him all over the house and Nate loves all the big brother attention.  

With our growing house of boys, I hope to make my mother proud as I work on being the mom that my mother was to me. 

Thursday, October 22, 2015

9 Months

Every month I vow to post more frequently than once a month. Here we are again, one month later, with no other post to show for.  Maybe this month will be better now that my nine month old is teething and crawling.

We have tried two Mother's Day Out programs- and both did not work for us.  We have tried three different nannies.  Our current Nannie is going on six weeks and it seems like we are all getting used to each other and things are working.  She truly is heaven sent and provides a faithful presence in our home. Maybe now I can find extra time to blog or I may just nap my extra time away.

The older boys are settling in and Nate really looks up to them.   He is always curious to see what the big boys are doing and wants to be around them.  I enjoy watching him crawl to the bottom step and stare up to staircase to get a glimpse of what his brothers are doing.  So far, they have been patient and kind with the little one. I have even caught myself saying, "Bring your little brother back down stairs!" They are pretty good at carrying him around and introducing him to boy stuff- for now anyway. 

Never in a million years would I have ever thought I would be a stay-at-home mom. I I always thought I would be a working mom.  That is not to say that stay-at-home mom's do not work.  We work and it is never easy.  I joke and say that we need one more Nannie so that each kid has an adult to work with. (I still can't figure out why da mister said h-e-double-hockey sticks NO to that one.) With the help of extra hands, we manage a fussy baby, 4th grade homework, 6th grade homework, dinner, and clean up time.  It is not always smooth between tutoring and teacher calls, but things are working and we are transitioning into our new rolls.  

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

8 Months

Nate is 8 months old today.  He started to crawl and is definitely a mama's boy.  Nathaniel is full of energy and does not sleep as much as a baby should.  I can relate to having a bouncing baby boy in the house and cannot help by let my heart smile when he gazes at me- no matter how tired I may be. 

Also, this past month my 90 year old grandfather past away.He lived a great long live and we know that he is finally resting well.  Popo was my reminder of my mother and my living connection to her.  I will miss his talks and words of wisdom.  It was such a blessing to have Popo meet Nathaniel, his great-grandson, at the beginning of the year. 

Although I do not boast often, this is a time to do so.  After two years and two months, we finally have full time custody of da boyz.  It has been a transition period for all of us but it has been worth the wait.  Needless to say I have been busy getting da boyz in school and settled, thus not many blog posts. Let's do the math- two boyz, a baby boy, and da mister equals four boyz and one Barbie in the house. 

This was my busy month.  Now that I have a nanny to help around the house, I hope that I will have more time to blog more regularly. 

  Ridin' on...

Monday, August 24, 2015

7 Months

Growing off the charts, Nathaniel is now seven months old.  We are still not sleeping through the night and I have him sleeping in the bed with me.  One day soon, that will change. Mark. My. Words.

Since I am a walking zombie, I am desperately searching for a Mother's Day Out program and looking for a reliable sitter.  I have learned that with most programs, I should have registered Nathaniel when I was pregnant. Who knew.

Let me introduce you to Korosh, my friend since college.  We never have been in a situation where I could see him with children until I introduced him to Nathaniel.  I was totally shocked to see how good he is with children.  After all this time, I never knew he is like a baby whisperer.  If only the babysitters I have been interviewing had half the magic as he does. 

Here is to good friends.  Even though we may see each other once a year, we always pick up right back where we left off. 

Saturday, August 8, 2015


Barbie and her bike now has Barbie and her baby. 

This is the bike that I rode across America on. I had to lower the seat way down so that my feet would touch the ground.  The seat was difficult for me to install so I ask a neighbor for an extra pair of hands.  After that, we were ready to roll.  However, my knees hit the back of the seat and I am getting used to the extra weight.  

For our first ride, we only rode up two houses.  Next time, I will ride earlier in the day when it is not so hot and after Nate's new infant bike helmet arrives.  Who knew that infant bike helmets even existed.

Ridin' on my friends.