Sunday, May 15, 2016
Today Bobby is one month old and Nathaniel is 15 months old. I have survived thus far with 5-6 hours of sleep a night, in two hour increments.
I won't lie, there are many days that I a living on fumes. Some how, some way, I get through the day. It is the little things that Nate does like he starts dancing to my phone ring tone or when he gives me a kiss. It maybe Bobby's little sleepy smile that give me my afternoon boost of energy. Whatever it is, I make it.
In all this joy, it is hard to hide the fact that my father is dying of ALS. Unfortunately, I have said this before with my mother; but I must say it again. It is extremely cruel and unfair to watch a loved one wither way and die before your eyes. If cancer is bad, ALS is worse. With ALS, my father is conscious and alert while he looses his strength and the ability to talk. Slowly, he will loose the ability to breath.
In so many ways, life is just not fair. I choose to believe that God gives us these trials to make us stronger and better people; while giving us bundles of joy to get us through the hard times.
I never give up hope.
Monday, April 25, 2016
Growing in pregnancy was difficult for me because I am used to being thin. Bobby kept growing and growing, and my belly seemed to be exploding. While I didn't really love the pregnancy experience, I still captured my belly at week 39 so I could look back and remember how big I was.
Bobby was 8 pounds 11 ounces, much bigger than we all expected him to be. He was born after 13 hours of difficult labor for me due to a nurse in training. The trama to Bobby put him in the NICU for three days and I was sad to be discharged a day early without my baby.
This Friday is more test and to ensure he continuing to gaining weight. We are working on getting his days and nights switched, because he seems to have them confused- and that means many sleepless nights for me.
I have a house full of boys and at times a still a walking zombie. Thank God for my help.
Wednesday, March 30, 2016
It is what all parents think. This I know to be true. I have the cutest kid ever.
This week I am 37 weeks pregnant and my one-on-one time with Nathaniel is slowly diminishing. This morning I woke up at 5:30 AM so I could drink my morning coffee, wake up, and be alert for when Nate woke up.
It is harder these days to bend over and walk with him because my baby bump is in the way. It is more challenging to chase him around at the park and even pick him up and carry him all day. My secret is to take a nap when he naps so that I can feel more rested. With sleep, anything is more possible.
I have given up on lunch dates and play dates so I can save my energy for Nate and evening with da boyz. As I get older, or should I say wiser, I am learning my limits and keeping things in perspective with what is important. My friends, if they are truly friends, will understand.
So for now, I must run. My baby is pulling my heart stings. I want to hug and kiss him and give him all my love.
Friday, March 11, 2016
This prayer is being shared on social media and it reminds me to remain calm in the craziness of my life. It is hard to rank the ten items because I have complained about every thing listed. When I look closely, it is the lack of sleep that makes me grumpy and thus I start complaining about everything else.
Nate wakes up with his dad at 5:30 AM. Every night I pray that he would sleep in a bit longer but it never happens. Nate seems to like the extra time with dad and enjoys seeing his big brothers off to school. Often I find myself counting down the minutes until nap time so I can squeeze in a nap myself.
Untimely, I am reminded of the baby I do have, the baby on the way, and the two boys that are growing into smart young men. The boys in the house are health and playful and I remind myself to forget about the to-do-list and have fun.
My house is full of love, though messy at times. I step back and examine all that I am grateful for and I know that there will be a time when I get more sleep and I will have all the time in the world to explore more roads on my bike.
Monday, February 22, 2016
I promised myself that I would only post monthly pictures of Nathaniel up until he was one year only. It seems fitting to post today because he is 13 months old and I am 32 weeks pregnant.
The past two weeks I felt overwhelmed with the thought of having a toddler and a baby in the house; but this week the idea has settled in my heart and I feel more at ease. It may have something to do with me enrolling Nathaniel in a Mother's Day Out program two times a week and having a reliable and dedicated nanny to help me with the three other boys in the house (four other boys if you count da mister).
The new baby idea became more fun as I downloaded the Fiesta app. As the rumor goes, my mother attended the day parade while she was having contractions and only went to the hospital to give birth to me after the parade was over. The thought of having a fiesta baby brings a new level of excitement to the game. My due date is April 18 and Fiesta officially starts on April 14.
My hope is that I have a fiesta baby to always have a fiesta birthday to celebrate along with. One must always know that the city of San Antonio gets together to help celebrate your birthday when it falls during fiesta.
Monday, February 8, 2016
Reading has always been a part of my life. I enjoy reading and going to new places, experiencing emotions, and getting a different perspective.
Most recently I read Goldfinch, a Pulitzer Prize winner for fiction. Initially I did not know how I would read all 776 pages of the book; but once I started, I loved every-single-perfectly-worded-sentence. Over the weekend I finished reading The Notorious RBG. Justice Ginsberg is inspirational and firm in getting equal rights for all- and I love that she can do 20 push-ups (I cannot even do 20 push-ups).
My hope is to impress on the boys the importance of reading and learning. The big boys have started reading book series and I often have to remind Jon to stop reading and finish his other homework. Or, to put his book down and let the dentist check his teeth.
Nate has started crawling to his bookshelf and bringing me books to read to him. He will get in my lap, get cozy, and smile as we flip the pages. He lights up with a smile, clap his hands, and laughs as we turn the pages. Reading the same book three times in a row never gets old when I read them to my children.
Nook has a free book Friday and I have been downloading those. I am always on the look out for a new book to read. If you have any suggestions, send them my way.
Friday, January 22, 2016
My baby boy is now one year old. Nathaniel has a few words in his repertoire but his most used are "this" and "that" and he points.
The things that melts my heart the most is when he crawls to the book shelf and brings me a book to read. I love that he smiles at hearing the story and claps when we get to the end. As a reader, I love that I have passed this enjoyment on to him.
Of course the cutest thing Nate does is "ojitos y besitos" (cute eyes and kisses)where he blinks his eyes and blows kisses.
This past year I have learned that being a mother brings an explosion of love to my heart along with some not so glamours moments of getting peed on. Definitely the highs are more extreme than the lows so that the lows do not even seem to matter.
This week I am 28 weeks pregnant with Bobbie, and start my third trimester. At the forefront of my thoughts is: How am I going to get more sleep? I must admit that I am exhausted from chasing around Nate and caring an extra belly around. In fifteen months from now, I will be gushing with pride when my second little man turns one.