Friday, November 6, 2009

Monkey See, Monkey Do

When I was in elementary school, I remember my family driving to Mexico and during the long drive; my sister and I had to go to the bathroom. My parents where not quite sure where a bathroom was much less a safe and clean bathroom. So, we improvised. My mother had us go to the bathroom in a cup while we were in the family van.

There was a time when I would hang out on the boat all day either on the lake skiing or in the middle of the gulf fishing. I learned that if I wanted to go out on the boat, I had to figure out how to pee in the water or the closest sand pile. Let’s just say I was a quick study.

My friends and I go to the bathroom in pairs. You would think that we could separate in the stall and finish our story after we take care of business, but no. We just keep on talking and pee at the same time.

My mom had a hard time believing this. Earlier this year mom was too weak to sit up and down and I had to escort her to the bathroom. Mom was so embarrassed. I tried to comfort her and tell her I do this all the time with my friends and not to worry, it is like a party that continues in the bathroom.

It is my fault, I started it. I am just doing what I know. On bike rides, I go to the bathroom behind a car or on the side of the road. Strategically, I will make sure there are no eyes in sight. It seems like Robert has become so used to seeing me squat on the side of the road that he has begun to go to the bathroom with the door open. This is taking it a little too far but I can not seem to break a habit that I have started.

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