Tuesday, August 11, 2009

My Wish

Today, Mom is having a biopsy to test for cancer. It is scary to think of the possible ramification of this. It is still way too early to speculate. The reality is that if it is positive, she will be removed from the transplant list.

Earlier this year, maybe March sometime, my mom vagaled on a routine visit to her doctors office. To us non- medial people, this means her blood pressure dropped, she turned pail and then fainted. When my father called me, all he said was, “Something happened to your mom. You need to get over here right now.”

My work is close to her doctor’s office. The normal 5 minute drive seemed to take hours. All I could think was, what if last night, in front of my sisters house, was the last time was going to say, “I love you” to my mom. Do I really have peace with my mom? It was on that drive when I realized I had to tell my mom all the things in my heart that I dearly wanted to say to her.

When I arrived, my mom was fine overall, dehydrated, tired and shaken up. She said she felt like she had taking her last breath. Since she lost her color, my father thought that life was leaving her. That routine office visit turned into an eye opening event for my familty. Life can be taken away so quickly. You never know the day or the time.

My mom sat me down and in great detail shared every secret she held close to her heart. It was also at that time I told her what a wonderful mom she is, how I would not have changed anything she did in rearing me and my sister. I love the fighter in her, how positive she is, and how she made me believe that I could accomplish anything I set my mind out to do. My wish to each of you is that you get a moment like this.

This was also the day that my mom told me to go on my bike trip. No matter her health, as long as she was not having the actual transplant, I was free to ride my bike across America. She understood the goal I set for myself. She knows that we all face challenges but we have to believe in ourselves and remain positive.

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