10 Month and Co-Sleeping

My baby boy is ten months old today. He is crawling and lifting himself up.  The past three weeks have been brutal with teething but we made it past the initial hump of four new teeth.

When Nate was born I was good about nursing him then putting him down in his pack-n-play located in our bed room.  Somewhere around month three, da mister suggested I just leave him in bed with me because it would be much easier and I would get more sleep. And it was initially.  

Then the nights turned into day time naps and  there you have it, we were co-sleeping.  Since I am a light sleeper, this has been hard on me because Nate would wake every few hours to nurse or just move and disturb my sleep.  I have been a walking zombie and this sleep pattern was not working for me. 

I tried exactly two times to let him cry it out but I could not take him screaming. So what does an exhausted mother do?  For me, I was tired.  My arms hurt from carrying around a cranky baby and I finally broke down.  

This past week I have endured the cries during nap time and on Friday evening I placed him in his crib for night time sleep.  Surprisingly, the night time sleep has been quiet even though not much sleep is really happening at this point. 

It is hard to hear him cry but I know that we are learning to self sooth (for me to) and develop better sleeping behaviors. What gives me hope is my pediatrician said that no parent that has ever done the cry out method has ever been sorry that they did. 

There you have it folks.  Barbie's guild to getting more sleep and getting stuff done.

Selfie

Recently I was challenged with selfies and taking the perfect picture.  I know I do it and I am sure you do it too.  We take a picture over and over and in different poses to find the one we like.  Then we spend another thirty minutes going through the all the pictures to find the best one to post on social media.  We only want to post the best picture of our self for the world to see.

It surprised me to read the comments on my FaceBook about this picture because in general they said, "You look so beautiful," but what I was feeling was so different.  

This day was October 31, 2015- Nathaniel's first Halloween. We also decided to have a gender reveal party to announce the sex of our new baby.  Let me lay my day down for you.  

I have a nine month old teething baby, I am not sleeping through the night and get two hours of sleep at a time, 10 AM appointment, 1 PM party, skip nap time due to late arrivals to the party, sneak in late lunch early dinner, get to the pumpkin patch one hour before closing, and I am 14 weeks pregnant. Through all that, I finally relaxed in a safe place with my baby.  I remember thinking, Wow, I finally get to sit down. I am happy to capture the joy of this moment with my baby boy. Okay, let me sit him on my lap to hide my baby bump and take a picture. 

I wish I could have a picture of me and Nate smiling but this was the best we could do. We made it and I have my cherished picture of Nathaniel in his blue M&M costume surrounded by pumpkins for his first Halloween. You may see only my smile and baby, but for me I remember every detail of the day.  Rushed, tired, and joyful are all things that I will remember when I see this picture.  

What it takes to be a Mom

This past week was the fifth year anniversary of my mother passing away. I miss her daily and remember what an amazing women she was.  As I struggle with the daily chores of being a mother, I recall all that Mom did and I wonder how she managed it all.  She went to nursing school, worked full time, volunteered at our PTA, was our Girl Scout Leader, organized employee picnics, played softball, and sold Mary Kay cosmetics.  There are days when I struggle just to brush my teeth and get myself dressed much less do homework with da boyz and cook dinner. Every day I am reminded how strong and determined Mom was. She is my roll model and is exactly like the mother I want to be to my children. 

What is a mother?  In the narrow sense of the word it comes down to caring for your children's success and guiding them and showing them how to become independent individuals. But it is much more than that.  It is never giving up, having patients, and caring enough to parent your child- even on the days when your patients runs out. 

Joe caught me off guard and said, "Mommie take our picture".  I'm not sure at what point he felt comfortable enough to call me Mommie but it is a moment that I have hoped for but never expected. It has not happened since but it is always a moment to capture. 

I love seeing the big boys play with Nate.  They carry him all over the house and Nate loves all the big brother attention.  

With our growing house of boys, I hope to make my mother proud as I work on being the mom that my mother was to me.